Crackpot Plans to Make Newbies Addicted to Trisphee
 

Real talk here.

How do we make people addicted to stay and post here? We sell them an equivalent to drugs. Something that people can't get enough of and will constantly buy to get their next "fix."

I'm talking about pixeled kittens. Small kittens, fluffy kittens, kittens coming out the ceiling, angry kittens, yawning kittens, we make everyone addicted to kittens. But with a twist, the kittens age, and when they get too old they become ugly, fat, and too lazy to even bat around a ball of yarn. That makes people want younger kittens to get their cuteness fix.

What do you guys think? Or does someone think they have a better idea then kittens. (Pfft doubt it.)

But there's already kittens D:

THERE MUST BE MOAR.

So much moar that it would make calling this site a crazy cat lady haven a compliment.

but each kitty comes with three poses. So that's like. . . a lot of kitties.

Maybe we should breed them with each other and they will multiply over time?

My girlfriend plays some kind of phone game where she attracts cats to her yard with catfood and sushi, and takes pictures of them...

...it's weird.

I have a tamagotchi app. . .

Neko Atsume! My wife plays it too.

I guess I need to look into this game xD

Yup,that's the one! (I just asked her.)

Let's take this idea, but in reverse! We attract all the girls with catfood and sushi.

... Okay one of those things don't sound right. Starbucks Coffee instead of Sushi. ;D

Hold up. Yes, we have kittens. But the key part of Illu's plan was the kittens growing old and fat. We don't have a timer on the kittens that makes them old and fat. We just hand out the kittens all willy-nilly, and they never expire. That doesn't make people want to come back to get more, new, adorable kittens. That's the most important part! Coda, Toho, you need to set up cat timers so that the kittens explode if the users don't log in every day.

I'll get on it. Give me a couple months!

You got a week.

It canna' be done, cap'n!

If I don't see exploding kittens in a week it's on lucid head for suggesting such a wonderful thing!