World's Worst!
 

Eh, you don't need your tonsils, your appendix, or one of your kidneys. Let's go ahead and take them out while we're in here.


Architect!

"Well, you don't *need* those support beams... They'll ruin the 'open floor plan' you asked for"

Hair dresser

"Well, it looks better in the back than the front."

Commercial Airline Pilot

"American Airlines is now offering sight seeing tours of Manhattan!"

Disneyland Employee

"They don't need pockets in this jacket, but I made it look like it has pockets, it's a style!"

Pastry Chef

One 18.25 ounce package chocolate cake mix.
One can prepared coconut pecan frosting.
Three slash four cup vegetable oil.
Four large eggs. One cup semi-sweet chocolate chips.
Three slash four cups butter or margarine.
One and two third cups granulated sugar.
Two cups all purpose flour.
Don't forget garnishes such as:
Fish shaped crackers.
Fish shaped candies.
Fish shaped solid waste.
Fish shaped dirt.
Fish shaped ethyl benzene.
Pull and peel licorice.
Fish shaped volatile organic compounds and sediment shaped sediment.
Candy coated peanut butter pieces. Shaped like fish.
One cup lemon juice.
Alpha resins.
Unsaturated polyester resin.
Fiberglass surface resins.
And volatile malted milk impoundments.
Nine large egg yolks.
Twelve medium geosynthetic membranes.
One cup granulated sugar.
An entry called 'how to kill someone with your bare hands'.
Two cups rhubarb, sliced.
Two slash three cups granulated rhubarb.
One tablespoon all-purpose rhubarb.
One teaspoon grated orange rhubarb.
Three tablespoons rhubarb, on fire.
One large rhubarb.
One cross borehole electro-magnetic imaging rhubarb.
Two tablespoons rhubarb juice.
Adjustable aluminum head positioner.
Slaughter electric needle injector.
Cordless electric needle injector.
Injector needle driver.
Injector needle gun.
Cranial caps.
And it contains proven preservatives, deep penetration agents, and gas and odor control chemicals.
That will deodorize and preserve putrid tissue.

(bonus points if you get the reference)

Barista

"Well... I don't care if you're depresso.... I'm NOT remaking that espresso..."

Puppeteer

“Well, it’s not like anyone else is going to read this, so I won’t bother commenting before each section, or keeping consistent indentation.”

(Also, Coda, every time someone spouts a huge list of ingredients, I immediately think FMA.)

Professor

Espy, that hits way too close to home. XD

(Not FMA, nope.)

"And so you have this complicated setup, and it obviously follows that this is true as a result. Proving the corollary is left as an exercise for the reader."

Forum moderator!

"It's-a me!"

City planner

-looks at the major cities in Aion- “Ah, yes, this will be perfect and perfectly sensical.”

OR

WHOEVER DESIGNED PITTSBURGH. (Pittsburgh is a bit of a triangle; it lies between two rivers. They’d apparently started building from the rivers up, but didn’t quite account for the fact that the rivers aren’t at 90 degree angles from each other, so the northern half of Pittsburgh is at roughly a 60 degree offset from the southern half. It gets really obvious when you pull up a map.)

And yeah, Coda, that’s my mindset whenever writing code, but I always have to go back and indent shit properly and organize my comments, bc I get docked points for that on assignments.

Hmm...

Babysitter.

"Yeah, they needed to eat so I just let them have whatever they wanted from the fridge so, that's why the cake is gone now. Sorry." <u<;

Paleontologist

"How did it go, again? The foot bone's connected to the leg bone, the leg bone's connected to the hip bone?"

Park ranger

(@Espy I got over my "indentation isn't worth doing right if no one's going to see it" phase some time in college. I at least had an excuse because I learned to program in an environment that didn't support indentation in source code -- if you put it in, it would strip it out! But once I started building nontrivial personal projects in a curly-braced language, I naturally started paying attention to indentation because it makes such a significant difference on being able to find things when you need it. ... comments on the other hand I'm still not so good about.)

"Make sure you leave a little bit behind for the bears okay? Bears gotta eat too and I'm getting really tired of picking up the knocked over garbage bins over and over."


Janitor

"Are you kidding? Why do I need to spend money on extra rags? This one is still working just fine."

Sculptor

"I call this piece, Dog pissing on Baby Number 3.~"

Bartender

http://xmpps.greenmaw.com/~coda/looneytunes-drink.png

Tutor

I'm not going to answer to give other players a chance, but it's games like this that make me wonder if I should look into adding a reaction system...

"You take this here shovel, and just uproot all o' the stalks here. Using a scythe just makes a mess o' things. Don't worry, we'll plant new ones later."

Therapist

"I hope today's session helped you deal with your dissociative identity disorder, Frank. That'll be $80 please. Now if you just let me have a word with Paul. Hi Paul, hope you found today's session helpful. That'll be $80 please. Oh, and can I talk with Jody for a minute? ..."

Astronaut

(W-was that a Pete Holmes reference? x'D)

~Kcshh~"Houston, uh, I think we have a problem with the uh, that uh, the, the big, uh, god what's it called? The big! Door thingy, hatch? It's really important, but I forgot what it was called. I can't ask since everyone passed out. Help me here will ya?...yeah, it's on the shuttle...it's white...on the outside, yeah, around it...it-it's not supposed to have a hole in it...The plug door!! That's what it's called! Thank you!"

Game Show Host